What do you do? (suicide attempts and calls for help)

I have a friend like this. I'll talk with him when he wants to talk but refuse to help him when he gets in trouble. He does it for attention and after years I finally stopped trying. So far being on his own entirely had stabilized him.

Long story short don't be too available. You become a crutch. On the other hand if you abandon her it might trigger something. Either way just being there is rarely enough. People don't change without doing something so repeating this over and over week likely result in more of the same. You need to get more involved or less involved.

Regardless remember whatever happens it's not your fault. Follow your heart, but don't go on autopilot.

a reply to: Biigs

Situations like this are never easy to deal with, not only because of the emotional distress they cause, but also because the human mind works so strangely sometimes, that one often finds oneself second guessing every word spoken, and every action taken.

What I would suggest however, is that the person to whom this thread refers, knows exactly what you would do in the event of receiving word of her intent to do herself harm, and so she cannot reasonably expect that you would respond in any other fashion than you have. Therefore if she is contacting you, she is expecting that response, or bloody well should be.

The last thing, the very last thing, that someone who is actually going to kill themselves does, is call someone or email someone, telling them of their intent, if they intend to off themselves by what I would call soft means, drug overdoses, drinking poison, that sort of thing. If they text you from a bridge they are about to leap off of, or email you with one hand, while the other holds the gun with the single round chambered and ready to go, then that is one thing, that is intent.

But no one who kills themselves slowly has any business being upset when their efforts are thwarted. If someone is actually desperate to end, they will find an immediate method which leaves no room for survival of any kind. Personally, I think that you have done the right thing in calling the police, and I hope that one way or another, this friend of yours stops doing this to you. I think it is deeply wrong of her to place you in that situation, especially since she states that her intention is to do you a further bad turn by removing herself from existence, which will no doubt result in a significant amount of psychological anguish on your part.

I am very sorry that you are going through this Biigs, and I hope that whatever the outcome, that you remain aware of your own awesomeness.

I have not heard any word from her yet.

I have found her on facebook (not previously added) and i have sent a few messages to friendly posters on her wall simply asking for an update as ive not been able to reach her for a bit suspecting internet outage - not to worry or spread panic to them, an indirect information gathering operation if you will.

Hopefully some light will come from it all.

Thank you once again for you support, its been a difficult 1 and 1/2 days so far.

a reply to: Biigs

If she has been placed in a psych unit you won't be able to contact her for at the min of 72 hours if not longer depending on how long she may be in for treatment. Unless you are immediate family you would not be contacted.

She obviously has issues you are not qualified to deal with. You've done all that could be asked of a friend, and then some.

If she has done something stupid, it's not your fault. Just remember that. It's not your fault what actions she has or has not taken.

Bless you for being a good and caring person Biigs. Let the professionals deal with her beyond this point.

Des

SHES OKAY!!!!!

she has been in hospital for 2 days, the cops i send round found her and called an ambulance and shes recovering. EDIT: she didnt contact me because she has been unconscious the whole time.

She is in a very bad place with many problems, im not sure how to take our friendship forward, she wasnt totally mad at me after all like you guys said.

sigh of relief like you possibly cant know. PHEW!

seems like youre a caring guy so you made the right choice for you..

from the little i have read it sounds to me like this person is just in pain and is crying out for help...for whatever reasons.

people that truly want to kill themselves usually dont go around talking about it and calling people and writing people to tell them. they just do it.
most people like this person you mentioned dont really want to kill themselves or it would have happened. people that have 'tried' it before or have 'failed' attempts. theyre not really failed attempts cause they didnt really try to kill themselves. they are crying out for help.

as far as what to do...

like i said earlier, you seem caring. she probably knows that and knows that even if you promised and she contacted you that you would still act on it.

i dont think that is a situation i would like to be in....

if you dont act and she actually does it, either on purpose or an accident you are going to feel bad. if you do act and she is 'saved' then you are just playing into this cry for help scenario that might continue on for a while.

i dont know man. i would say do what is in your heart.

i think though that this person has some issues. they are hurting and they probably are depressed. i think though if they really wanted to die then they would be dead.