The fact that an older guy is a virgin is almost never from a lack of desire, or from a moral or religious standpoint, but rather from a lack of
options. Biologically speaking, guys are internally driven to have sex, plain and simple. On the other hand, females are wired a bit differently,
mainly because in nature it is the females doing the selecting while the males are doing the soliciting. So basically the guys chase after the girls,
which affords women the luxury of being highly selective. Seeing as how they are the ones who rear the offspring they have certain maternal instincts,
this fact plays in to how they view mating from a biological perspective. Of course there are women who are just as promiscuous as men, and I think
part of this has to do with the fact that they can prevent impregnation in modern times, and this allows them much more freedom. I don't think it can
be argued that women are the ones who have to go through labor, and who will have a much greater attachment to a child than a man, and that it makes
sense for a women who cannot prevent impregnation to be even more selective.
It also depends on how in tune a women is with her desires and how comfortable she is with the idea of sex itself. What generally drives a woman to
have sex with a man is a certain attraction. That attraction is not something she controls by any means, rather it is generated by some men and not by
others. The guys who would like to have sex but who do not get the opportunities are of the latter type, or those who do not naturally generate
attraction in women. The good news for those guys is that they can change how women naturally respond to them, without the woman even knowing it.
There are certain things that generate attraction for women that they do not consciously realize, even before a guy says a single word. Attraction is
biological in that primitive women wanted to mate with the males who could offer them certain advantages, one of the most important being protection.
Women generally are not attracted to guys who are weak, which equates with behaving in ways that make one appear weak, and thus unattractive. And of
course a guy should behave differently towards different women, based on how attractive the woman is. That might sound bad, but generally speaking
very attractive women have been treated differently their whole lives, and the guys they are more attracted to are the ones who stand up to them and
don't treat them like they've been treated their whole lives, and who don't do everything to try to please them. For more down to earth women the
attraction still must be present, but things take on less of an "alpha male" characteristic, because even in nature the females did mate with males
who were not at the head of the group. And one need not go out of their way to behave a bit differently like you would with an extremely beautiful
woman who has been treated like a beauty queen her whole life, and who has had everyone kiss up to her.
So I've established that sex is a biological drive, and therefore to suppress this drive is an instance of intelligence overriding instinct, at least
in my opinion. One is using their intellectual beliefs to deprive themselves of a natural instinct. And girls can do this more easily than guys much
of the time. Women are very interesting, in a variety of ways, but the thing that I have always found the most fascinating is their adaptability. They
are so much more adaptable than us guys, and are much more apt to "go with the flow." I always hear guys saying how complicated women are, but truth
be told they are not really that complicated, at least once you understand a few fundamental things. One of the most important things to understand
about women is that there are two things that will essentially kill attraction for them, and those things are predictability and boredom. Being
predictable means being like all the other guys out there, which definitely doesn't generate any attraction, and being boring and not spontaneous does
not work in your favor either. So for those guys who find it a problem attracting women, and who do not have sex for this reason, there is hope.
Beating yourself up about it, or being uncomfortable with any part of yourself, is the opposite of what you should be doing. Success requires a
complete attitude shift. You can message me if you would like me to expand on these topics for you, and I would be glad to help.
Anyway, the girls who make the decision to remain a virgin are probably doing a good thing, because as I said they are the ones who go after
sustainability. They want a companion who they are attracted to and who can support both them and their children. This is why the females go after the
alpha males among just about all mammalian species. A guy being rich can be attractive in itself, but most women would rather be with a man they're
attracted to than marry for money to a guy they are not attracted to. At least that is what I think they think. This is because they are driven to the
one guy instinctively, while they would have to go against their instincts to be with the rich guy. But sometimes money is attractive, but a guy need
not be rich to make a woman attracted to them. Whenever a woman has sex with a guy, especially if she hasn't known him that long, she often views it
differently than the guy. There is more of a connection, a giving of herself, and as a virgin girl gets older and older, she will be more selective.
Most girls lose their virginity before they are looking to get married and settled down, so a virgin who is looking for those things is not going to
have sex for fun in most instances.
A girl who waits to have sex after marriage is basically getting an insurance policy that the guy loves her enough to tie himself to her, and there is
much less of a risk that he is interested in her for purely sexual reasons. Which let's face it, happens all the time. A girl thinks the guy is
interested in a more long-term relationship, when sometimes the guy only makes the girl think that to get in her pants. It is an underhanded tactic to
be sure, but many guys do it. The pressure to avoid sex before marriage is a social construct, not a biological drive. Or maybe more of a religious
construct. If you are raised in a household that is strictly religious, and you were brought up to believe that you should wait to have sex, and if
you still believe that, there is no problem. That person would just have to keep from yielding to their natural instincts when certain situations
arise. So even though waiting till marriage is bucking biology, there is nothing wrong with it. It is just that the person is missing out on certain
amounts of fun, but it is not detrimental to their health or anything. If a person is pressured by their family not to have sex, but they themselves
wish to, that is another matter. My advice would be to weigh the consequences against the benefits. Sex is not really that big of a deal imo, neither
having it, or not having it. Society teaches us that it is a big deal. Look at bonobos...sex for them is like shaking hands. They do it all the time,
with anyone.
edit on 11/7/14 by JiggyPotamus because: (no reason given)