a reply to:
Thurisaz
Your pain and suffering has obviously been prolonged and intense. Condolences.
The jerk parents probably had jerk parents who gave them serious ATTACHMENT DISORDER, too.
Who knows how many generations it goes back to.
Congrats for detaching from all that poison and abuse.
Now the task is to let go the hate and unforgiveness.
FOR YOUR SAKE.
They are poison and can even result in cancer as well as serious arthritis etc.
Forgiveness does not mean the perpetrator is off the hook. It mostly means you resign as prosecuting atny, judge, jury and executioner. God will
handle those tasks far better than you could, anyway.
Forgiveness means you pull the dagger out of your own back; out of your own heart and lay it aside as unfitting for your healthier life.
If you find it difficult--say something like:
I CHOOSE TO FORGIVE, REGARDLESS. I release them to God's justice [or karma or however you care to put it] and let go of my need to punish them or
take revenge.
Say it however often the memory of their horror comes to mind. Ask God or however you care to--to help make it real to you at a heart, emotional
level.
Whether it takes weeks or months or years, to fully feel it--IT IS WORTH DOING--FOR YOUR OWN PEACE AND HEALTH.
May you make progress in your healing . . . beyond the progress you've already made.
One Canadian friend I know who was locked in a tiny closet repeatedly as a 3-8 year old or so . . . developed Disassociative Disorder . . . may have
the label wrong--detached herself from the pain and from her own basic identity . . . developing other personalities to escape into.
She's still--at 60+ working hard--to overcome the residue of all that.
Anyway--the following may be of value to you.
BO X ATS ATTACHMENT DISORDER THREAD LINK:
www.abovetopsecret.com...
See also:
ATTACHMENT DISORDER LINKS
REACTIVE ATTACHMENT DISORDER FOR EDUCATORS:
artweidman.wordpress.com...
WIKIPEDIA:
en.wikipedia.org...
DIRECTORY OF SITES:
www.radkid.org...
ATTACHMENT DISORDER IN ADULTS:
www.buzzle.com...
BEHAVIOR MANAGEMENT TRAINING FOR THE TREATMENT OF REACTIVE ATTACHMENT DISORDER:
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov...
BEST AUTHOR ON TOPIC:
BONDING AND ATTACHMENT IN MALTREATED CHILDREN: HOW CAN YOU HELP: DR BRUCE PERRY
teacher.scholastic.com...
BO X ATS ATTACHMENT DISORDER THREAD LINK:
www.abovetopsecret.com...
DR BRUCE PERRY’S CHILD TRAUMA ACADEMY:
childtrauma.org...
IMPACT OF ABUSE AND NEGLECT ON THE DEVELOPING BRAIN:
www.attachmentdisorder.net...
ATTACHMENT: THE FIRST CORE STRENGTH:
teacher.scholastic.com...
BONDING AND ATTACHMENT IN MALTREATED CHILDREN: BRUCE PERRY
childrenneedfamilies.blogspot.com...