Addicted To Fear

1 John 4:18 - There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Many years ago before I began my own personal journey for something I, at the time, could not describe or give a name to. Eventually I came to the conclusion that my journey was a search for myself, who I really was.

Before that, I was a huge conspiracy theorist. I was literally addicted to that feeling you get when you hear something that sounds remotely logical, full of doom and gloom, that strikes fear in your heart. My first experience with this was after 9/11, when reports that terrorists were focusing on attacking other areas of the United States (one of which was just a couple of miles away from my home).

Later, it would be the first predicted date that Planet X would destroy us all (March or May of 2004, I think). On top of all the dozens things that were waiting under my bed to get me, I was also listening to GCN (Genesis Communications Network), home to folks like Alex Jones and Jeff Rense. Although I find these men, and others like them, intelligent, their knack for really pushing the fear button kept me on the edge of my seat. I lost many a night's sleep, scared that a brown dwarf star would kill us all, a nuke would land near my town, a supervolcano would block out the sun, aliens would invade the Earth, we would all be forced to have RFID chips in our skin, nanobots would turn everything into grey goo, and Oprah would turn out to be the Antichrist and usher in a thousand years of darkness.

Okay, maybe the last one was kidding, but the former examples, and others like it, kept me in a perpetual state of fear, quaking, shaking in my boots, afraid to buy a GPS, drink tap water, and even go outside when I saw jets spraying chemtrails everywhere.

But now I'm not afraid of any of those things. I'm not afraid of aspartame, Big Brother, or Elenin.

I think that, truly, I was addicted to that fear. I liked, for some reason or the other, the feeling of being scared of illogical things. One way or the other, I couldn't pry myself away from Youtube to search for hidden messages in Revelations, or from the Alex Jones show, or from any of the multitudes of conspiracy websites (ATS being a particularly unique exception).

Now I have nothing to fear. That isn't to say I never am afraid, but I know how to be mindful of it and handle the situations accordingly.

There is no greater illusion than fear,
no greater wrong than preparing to defend yourself,
no greater misfortune than having an enemy.
Laozi

They say when you reach satori (a brief flash of enlightenment, or a great truth), the only thing left to do is have a good laugh. Which is why I have to thank those on this website who create threads about the end of the world, impending race wars, horrible crimes, the New World Order, the Illuminati, 2012, and everything else under the sun that could cause fear, sadness, and anger.

Because of you, I can have a good laugh any time I desire.

reply to post by ManjushriPrajna


Now this,is definatly what ive been looking for in the last 7 years and im now 21.

And that,really,has nailed it.

The point in life is the searching for yourself,like,rememberence

reply to post by ManjushriPrajna

Okay, maybe the last one was kidding, but the former examples, and others like it, kept me in a perpetual state of fear, quaking, shaking in my boots, afraid to buy a GPS, drink tap water, and even go outside when I saw jets spraying chemtrails everywhere. But now I'm not afraid of any of those things. I'm not afraid of aspartame, Big Brother, or Elenin.

I wouldn't say that tap water with fluoride and aspartame are very healthy for you. Big Brother is real too.

I agree, you shouldn't live in fear, but some of those things are real and should definately be a concern.

Sometimes its not about being fearful, its about being informed.

I, too, would freak out and couldn't fall asleep thinking Yellowstone might blow or the next big one might hit LA. However, I realized that I have no control over it and at the end of the day, being informed that it can/will happen, will just prepare me better than having no idea of what's to come.

reply to post by RandomEsotericScreenname


Well, I'm certainly not going to drink tap water and Diet Coke by the bucket fulls, but a cup here or a glass there every so often isn't going to kill me. Most of the time I drink tea, coffee, or bottle water anyways.

reply to post by ManjushriPrajna


So you willfully poison yourself and expect people to not wonder why you felt paranoid ??

Most of the fears of today are very much based on the chemical imbalances, and quoting a Bible verse...true as it may be, is a huge cause for fear.

That Bible has been used for so much killing, death and fear it is beyond belief...in fact all religions are Fear-based...fear is ingrained into an off-balance society.

Try turning your inner light on FULL POWER, and see if certain entities do not pay you a visit, you will be scared again, i can tell since you talked about feeling the fear so much before.

What alot of people do not seem to realize, is that feeling and EXPERIENCING the fear in its fullest is what brings understanding and growth, but most of us RESIST the feelings, and thus get trapped between both.

The continual flood of doom porn on this forum, is something which I grow extremely tired of myself as well. I've written about that elsewhere.

I think I am starting to become desensitised to it, though. My perspective now isn't enlightened; it's cynical. There's only so many times that I can see a screaming headline about Monsanto, or impending doom from Fukashima, or the Deepwater Horizon disaster etc, to then have the world keep going as usual as though nothing had happened at all, before I realise that such stories are ultimately completely inconsequential. I also can't turn the radio on now, without hearing stories of impending financial chaos, either.

I honestly think that people just crave stimulation. They experience chronic boredom due to the banality and emptiness of their lives, so they feel a need for something which is going to make them excited, even if the source of said excitement seems horrifying and apocalyptic.

So I'd encourage everyone here to remember that, next time you read some headline which is predicting the end of the world. The odds are almost certain that you'll still wake up tomorrow morning, and everything will be completely normal. Prices might get incrementally higher, yes; but they've always done that. Politicians might get incrementally more corrupt, evil, and psychopathic, but they've always done that. The weather might be variable, weird, and bizarre, but you'll still find people growing vegetables, and you can grow yours indoors, if you need to.

In other words, realise that such stories are meeting someone's psychological needs, and if that someone isn't you, don't worry about it. It's not about said stories being factually true, accurate, or logical; it's about whether or not they can generate a screaming feargasm in the mind of the viewer.

reply to post by GrinchNoMore


if god say, fear or u wont get anything, then everybody stand still to get more by expecting it

if god say, u must b crashed down continuously for the stinky animal u r, then everybody act as most disgusting animals ever to get the sense of being alive

if god say, u must prove being gods humans standing above everybody else as god rule everyone
then everybody refuse to look other then up and keep shouting to others how they must b ruled while they would stand over them forever

if god say, u must stop fearing loosing ur bodies existence in order to get a potential right for eternal life, then everybody start to dance over death claiming how fun is to see others dying n screaming bc they are eternals

so now u are saying that u stop fearing terrorism then u r surely enlightened by being eternal

i will never get ur logics bases, it is too easy to see what u think since u dont think it is always in first degree terms as if any can b a conclusion of nothing

anyways, for any thread there must b an extreme opinion, and this is mine

Originally posted by ManjushriPrajna

But now I'm not afraid of any of those things. I'm not afraid of aspartame, Big Brother, or Elenin.

Now I have nothing to fear. That isn't to say I never am afraid, but I know how to be mindful of it and handle the situations accordingly.

So which is it? First you are not afraid, then you have nothing to fear, but you cannot say that you are never afraid, even though you just did?

Just curious, were you actually addicted to fear? or addicted to irrational conclusions? There is a huge difference in being addicted to fear, and being addicted to irrationality. That very irrationality, and having blind convictions towards things that haven't been proven, would breed totally irrational fear. If the grounds for any belief are built on a foundation of irrationality, anything produced from these ideas, including fear, will be completely irrational.

Maybe you were addicted to not thinking critically, and you enjoyed all the irrationality that stemmed from your thoughts. I only say this because if you were truly addicted to fear, you would be jumping into lions cages or oncoming traffic, just for the feel of it. But all you mention is ideas, or things you could only ever speculate on. That's more of a worry, and not a fear.

The rush the body gets when it is fearful it is like excitment, it excites the body. People now a days are addicted to that rush. Console gaming and violent movies provide a hit as well.

reply to post by ManjushriPrajna


It sounds like you were using those "fears" as an excuse not to live your life.

A lot of people do this. It's not on purpose, but it is easier to exist in a little "safe" bubble, where everything bad that might happen will happen. Every step is potential death. So, they stop venturing out into the unknown. These are people who are easily controlled, some of them can be seen hoarding various items, and a lot of them tend to be very judgmental and speak harshly to anyone they feel threatened by.

Now, this can also apply to people who refuse to take responsibility for their lives and for their actions. Everything that happens - good or bad - is someone else's fault, the blame lies squarely on the universe's shoulders. These people are afraid of being at fault, at being responsible for bad things that have happened or will happen..

Alternatively, there are people who love the thrill of fear as power, so they indulge in fear as much as possible - daring death to claim them.

We all know of people who stopped growing mentally after about age 15. We all know of people who live carelessly. We all know of people who live in fear.

It is as much fear of death as it is a fear of life.

Most people live in fear, not because they are addicted to it... but because they are comforted by it.

But, it looks like you've escaped that trap of fear. Excellent.

no one get the true justification of fear in abstract logics

why do u exist?? u dont know, u look around every second wat do u do with those seconds of awareness while u must do things with ur hands and legs, but back what to think ?? u how b constant??

there is nothing that could b convincing for u, since u r not the reality u r looking to as if it was u, u didnt realize ur body nor ur environment u didnt meant to exist literaly to b there cosntantly
so anything u might come up with alone as aware would b speculation at its best and nothing right for sure

then, any negative emotion or perspective seem more right, in case u can survive as u r through and detach urself from

it sounds more logical that there is smthg wrong which is not u, so those ideas save u as u r more then u alone where u would then forced to come up with smthg worse

noone wants to say the truth, bc truth is superiority so all and any positive thing is to objective freedom so never to anyone
while anyone hate to assume its absolute freedom from any else and starve to keep proving that it loves positive sense, it is a lie
satan proves it

the sense of any is freedom not positive

reply to post by ManjushriPrajna

That is a very good perspective you have there, I especially like how you ended with a Bill Hicks video.

I think of fear in this way. It is a very important emotion to help keep one from harm. The fear of falling off the roof while cleaning out your gutters is a good fear to have. When fear is used by others to manipulate your decision than this is when it becomes false. The use of terrorism to manipulate good citizens into giving up freedom is false in this case. Remember all the seaport 'MarSec Level' and airport 'Threat Level' signs? This is a good example of using fear in a false manner so as to manipulate public opinion.

upload.wikimedia.org...
Notice there is no place for 'No threat of terrorist attacks'. This is a good example of how one could perpetuate a continuous state of fear and equally a good example of a false fear.

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself!"

Originally posted by ManjushriPrajna
Later, it would be the first predicted date that Planet X would destroy us all (March or May of 2004, I think). On top of all the dozens things that were waiting under my bed to get me, I was also listening to GCN (Genesis Communications Network), home to folks like Alex Jones and Jeff Rense.

Jones is sensationalistic, and a paranoid hysteric, who despite that, occasionally makes statements and provides information which can be extremely useful. Rense is a rabid, over-generalising anti-Semite. I am not an anti-Semite, personally; although I'm also aware that the Israeli government and AIPAC would probably consider me one, simply because I don't believe that they should automatically get everything they want, purely because of who they are.

Every ethnic group on the planet has a sub-population of 4-7% who are inherent, neurological psychopaths, and who are energetically oriented towards what has been referred to as the Service to Self polarity; which is the equivalent of what is colloquially referred to as "evil." Israel as a specific group are no exception, and I suspect that the majority of its' psychopathic/STS 4-7% have gravitated to its' government and American lobby groups.

The other 93-96% of ethnic Israelis, however, are no more or less innocent than the non-psychopathic population of any other ethnic group on Earth, and they do not deserve to have negative generalisations made about them, due to the actions of their psychopathic minority.

we would all be forced to have RFID chips in our skin, nanobots would turn everything into grey goo

I consider these two scenarios to be legitimate risks. We'd most likely be chipped already, if it wasn't for the vigilance of individuals who refuse such, and have been very vocal in their rejection of it. The depravity of transhumanism is quite real, and unfortunately, some of its' adherents are in positions where they could try and turn elements of their insanity into tangible, physical reality, if they are not stopped.

I've also seen chemtrails myself. They are quite real. Whether or not they contain harmful or lethal agents, on the other hand, is a different topic; but the trails themselves are real.

In terms of tapwater, where I currently live it is non-potable. It is very highly chlorinated, yet also still contains sufficient bacteria that it is able to cause gastro-entoritis in those who drink it. I buy bottled water.

But now I'm not afraid of any of those things. I'm not afraid of aspartame, Big Brother, or Elenin.

In my opinion, the fear of Elenin was entirely unrealistic. Said fear was at least partly based on a YouTube video released by an Australian "psychic," who claimed that the planet would be destroyed by it.

Aspartame I consider an issue, due to it apparently being a neurotoxin, but I avoid it by avoiding diet soft drinks.

As for Big Brother, while I have not studied the cabal as thoroughly as some, I have as extensively as I dare, without potentially endangering my own soul in the process. I have become convinced that they are entirely real, and that their objectives can be discovered by reading the books Red Symphony, The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion, and studying the Georgia Guidestones. The question of whether or not they are deserving of fear, as far as the fulfillment of their objectives is concerned, has yet to be decided.