something to share to help cope with grief

I have dealt with grief before. It is the worst feeling in the world. And I am saddened that my friends on ats are dealing with it, and the loss of our friend Jkrog.

7 years ago I lost somoene very close to me. I understand the frustration of grief. It is the strongest, most powerful emotion that breaks you down to humble, helpless pieces. It is the emotion that makes you feel powerless, and absolutely nothing you can do about it.

So for those suffering, and for thse who have lost loved ones in the past, I wanted to post some pieces of comfort, that helped me. If anyone else has anything, please feel free to share.

The Dragonfly Story

Down below the surface of a quiet pond lived a little colony of water bugs. They were a happy colony, living far away from the sun. For many months they were very busy, scurrying over the soft mud on the bottom of the pond. They did notice that every once in awhile one of their colony seemed to lose interest in going about. Clinging to the stem of a pond lily it gradually moved out of sight and was seen no more.

"Look!" said one of the water bugs to another. "one of our colony is climbing up the lily stalk. Where do you think she is going?" Up, up, up it slowly went....Even as they watched, the water bug disappeared from sight. Its friends waited and waited but it didn't return...

"That's funny!" said one water bug to another. "Wasn't she happy here?" asked a second... "Where do you suppose she went?" wondered a third.

No one had an answer. They were greatly puzzled. Finally one of the water bugs, a leader in the colony, gathered its friends together. "I have an idea". "The next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk must promise to come back and tell us where he or she went and why."

"We promise", they said solemnly.

One spring day, not long after, the very water bug who had suggested the plan found himself climbing up the lily stalk. Up, up, up, he went. Before he knew what was happening, he had broke through the surface of the water and fallen onto the broad, green lily pad above.

When he awoke, he looked about with surprise. He couldn't believe what he saw. A startling change had come to his old body. His movement revealed four silver wings and a long tail. Even as he struggled, he felt an impulse to move his wings...The warmth of the sun soon dried the moisture from the new body. He moved his wings again and suddenly found himself up above the water. He had become a dragonfly!!

Swooping and dipping in great curves, he flew through the air. He felt exhilarated in the new atmosphere. By and by the new dragonfly lighted happily on a lily pad to rest. Then it was that he chanced to look below to the bottom of the pond. Why, he was right above his old friends, the water bugs! There they were scurrying around, just as he had been doing some time before.

The dragonfly remembered the promise: "the next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk will come back and tell where he or she went and why." Without thinking, the dragonfly darted down. Suddenly he hit the surface of the water and bounced away. Now that he was a dragonfly, he could no longer go into the water...

"I can't return!" he said in dismay. "At least, I tried. But I can't keep my promise. Even if I could go back, not one of the water bugs would know me in my new body. I guess I'll just have to wait until they become dragonflies too. Then they'll understand what has happened to me, and where I went."

And the dragonfly winged off happily into its wonderful new world of sun and air......

LINK

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die

no one else wants to put anything? (

no one else wants to put anything? (

I don't believe I have anything to add to this, but thanks for sharing. I had never heard the one about the dragonflies before, quite lovely.

I think you did well enough on your own hun. Thanks! I loved the dragonfly story, and I have always loved that poem.

I have lost so many people in my life, so I am no stranger to grief. I have planted things in the garden in their honor and placed a beautiful angel sculpture there. I keep my memories of them with me always and know that one day I too will pass on to a better place.

I think that our family member or friend or pet would want us to cherish the memories of them and not be overwhelmed with sadness. Thanks for a lovely thread and your thoughtfulness.

[edit on 7-3-2010 by Night Star]

Explanation: Flagged!

Personal Disclosure: OL has experienced the passing of 9 souls in past 2 months. [4 were close friends including JKrog08 and 1 was my aunt]

Only my aunt's passing was not tragic or violent in nature and for that both I and she were blessed...but the others were all a tragic losses and I'm finding it very hard not to have issues with tissues.

As a note to myself and a recommendation for my fellow members, I present this poem by Dylan Tomas ...

DO NOT GO GENTLE INTO THAT GOOD NIGHT

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Poem Source [bigeye.com]

RIP to all souls who have recently grown far beyond what I/We can sense and RIP to myself and the others who have been left [temporarily] behind.

Achlys

Nixie, I had never heard the dragonfly story either...but it is completely beautiful and perfectly conveys my belief that our energy simply transfers from one existence to another.