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It has emerged that the crew of a Nimrod used a teapot to block a hatch gap in their plane after a mid-air mechanical fault...The spokeswoman said: "There was a minor malfunction with the hatch cover and the teapot would have been used to make it more comfortable for the crew".
source
source
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last...
P. Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding
on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
Originally posted by snafu7700
lol...kind of reminds me of a quantas airlines maintenance report:
source
Quantas Jokes
Originally posted by Ghost01
No Offense, but you were reading the Jokes page! None of this stuff is for real. They were pulling your chain!
Tim
Originally posted by snafu7700
actually, it's true.
Originally posted by Ghost01
I'm sorry to hear that! Iwas expecting more sense from the people who are responsible for the lives of so many others.
Tim
Originally posted by snafu7700
so maintenance personnel cant have a sense of humor? if you had done a little research, you would have found that quantas has the best safety record of any major airline....and yet their sense of humor is more importantant to you than their safety record?
[edit on 14-12-2006 by snafu7700]
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
Originally posted by Ghost01
When I said that this was a joke, I was referring to the items in the log. The items in the log such as:
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
I was inferring that this was a joke and not a real events! When you said it was real, I mistaking assumed you meant this is how these people do their Jobs. Making joes in your off time is one thing, but waiting to replace a worn tire is unsafe!
I have no problem with making Jokes, but I Do Not wish to fly on a airplane where the mechanic doesn't have the sense to fix a leak before the next flight!
Tim
Originally posted by timski
although you gotta laugh at the idea that the RAF provides military-issue teapots for flight crew.
Originally posted by Ghost01
Sometimes my sense of humor is a bit off. Hey, misunderstanding happen!
Tim