My father passed away Thursday night.

a reply to: Liquidiron

I am so very sorry for your loss. I have lost both my Parents years ago as well as many others, so I can relate. Take one day at a time and hold onto hope. It's all we can do really. Much love and light and a big warm hug.

a reply to: Liquidiron

I'm sorry for your loss...

I hope you can follow your heart, go to NY, have that pizza!
Meet new people, discover old friends... be happy

originally posted by: Liquidiron
Sadly, my father passed away Thursday night due to many health complications. My mother she passed in 2017 from cancer (her fifth time). I am working down in Arizona on the Intel job (I’m a union ironworker) and my dad (we are originally from the Keweenaw peninsula) was in Wisconsin in the hospital. After my ma passed he just gave up on life and stopped taking care of himself. He had bad diabetes complications. I spoke with him on the phone on Father’s Day and told him I would be home soon to see him and that I woke cook him his favorite meal (spaghetti and meatballs which I make really well) and I got a phone call 1045 Arizona time telling me he had passed. I saw it coming but, he was my dad. The last parent left. I hopped in my rig and put some blues on and took a drive in the warm Arizona evening. I woke up in the morning to a call from a close family friend (funeral director) and my room was pitch black. I turned the lights on and they began to flicker like crazy. I got it on video. It’s wild. Anyways I guess what I’m saying it’s a stranger feeling being the only one left. Everyone back in Montana where I live, call me the high plains drifter lol I just drift from town to town work the high steel. Now I search for good conversations and meals and the occasional high dollar scotch. My long time girlfriend who knew me best, she passed away a few years back.
I love working high steel being an ironworker and traveling to new places. I feel as if I’m chasing a feeling of being alive constantly. I think I’m gonna take a spontaneous trip to New York for new years. Always wanted to try the pizza and Italian food out there.

Check in on your family even if the relationship is strained. Life is short.

There is such a thing as too much loss. Too much has been taken from you both - taken and taken and taken, until there's nothing left but hope, and you've given that up because it hurts too much. Until you would rather die, or kill, or avoid attachments altogether, than lose one more thing.
N.K. Jemisin

Always forward, never back,

Liquidiron

He may rest in peace.
Loss of very close relatives and friends it's hard for everyone. But you need to live your life well from now on so to remember and honour them.

a reply to: Liquidiron

So very sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. I understand the "orphan on the planet" type feeling. Keep up hope

originally posted by: Boadicea
Big sympathy hugs. It's never easy losing those we love. Whether it's expected or out of the blue, sudden or drawn out, there is always the same pain along with the unique pain of every passing.

When my mother passed, I became acutely aware that all of my elders were gone. I could no more rely on their wisdom and experience and humor to get through life. It's been very strange recognizing myself in the position of "elder" for my (adult) children, and even my nieces and nephews.

Be good to yourself. Treat yourself to all the happy and loving memories you can. And talk to your loved ones. They'll know. They'll hear. And maybe -- just maybe -- you'll hear them answer you.

My aunt was the last of the elders for us. She was pretty funny about it. She said “woo-hoo I never thought I’d win the brass ring for being the last one standing”.
Kind of like the Golden Girls, when Betty White and Bea Arthur were the last two left, they would always say the other one was going next and they’d be the winner.
I guess it unfolds for all of us and for all families, and with a little luck we can be OK with it.

a reply to: greendust
I was 17 when my dad died, and that was 47 years ago, wow. Like Fred Sanford, he “had the big one” and was just gone like that.
It was a shock, but we’ve all had pleasant times over the years, remembering him fondly because he was a funny, interesting, good guy. My latest observation is that I’m 10 years older than he ever got.
If I could see him today, at his oldest, I’d say “hey young feller, how’s it going ?”
So I guess it’s funny little things like that, that make these things OK.

a reply to: stevieray

My aunt was the last of the elders for us. She was pretty funny about it. She said “woo-hoo I never thought I’d win the brass ring for being the last one standing”.

Good for her! I hope she had her own naughty little vice too that might have suggested she wouldn't be the last one standing but that she enjoyed till the end. Attitude is everything in life, and it's always so much easier and happier when you can find even the littlest bright side (or humorous side) to a difficult matter. I've lost one sibling. I couldn't imagine being the last one standing...

Kind of like the Golden Girls, when Betty White and Bea Arthur were the last two left, they would always say the other one was going next and they’d be the winner. I guess it unfolds for all of us and for all families, and with a little luck we can be OK with it.

I'm glad Betty won 😇

Well ya know what that means....

you're next.

a reply to: Liquidiron
Condolences to you and the rest of your family. Losing a parent is one of the hardest things you'll ever go through.
It's also difficult to comprehend and accept becoming the patriarch of the family when death is what bestows that honor onto you. 32 is young to lose a parent, I was in my 40's when I lost both of mine. Keep moving forward, but don't hesitate to fondly remember the good times you had with your pop. Nothing wrong with being nostalgic, but like you alluded to, don't dwell there, always keep your chin up and keep on keeping on, because it's what your pop would have wanted you to do. I raise a glass to you, your father, and the rest of your kin.

a reply to: Liquidiron

I am saddened to hear of your loss. I hope you find peace.

a reply to: Liquidiron

Sorry for your loss.

I lost my dad last August, miss him to bits and always will.

a reply to: Liquidiron

I am sorry for your loss Liquidiron. My father lives in Montana, and him being 90, I know that his time is likely near. Never give up, my friend. We can't imagine what is in our future, and you are a free spirit. I hope you do those things that you always dreamed of, but didn't do because you were the responsible one.

All best.

a reply to: Liquidiron

My most stern and honest condolences go out to you for your loss my dear Sir...! My heart goes out to you and your family for him who was dearest...!

I'm new. I hope I'm doing this right.

I'm sorry for all the loss your going thru.

I tell you the following to explain why I relate. My son took his life at the age of 17 a couple of years ago during Christmas. The light went out of my world. I shattered.

Then dad died, then mom shortly after. My family are not good people. So my mother's death gave me freedom but I felt so alone.

It's the long walk in the dark night. For me, I have used it to learn about myself and thru the process of healing, I have learned how to help others along the way. That's me tho.

I know the limbo you speak of. I used to say I felt like I was drifting in a sea with no wind. I had to make my own wind.

I took all that pain and I channel it. I use it to speak up about certain things. In that, I found purpose and a place in this world.
You sound light years ahead of me in terms of self awareness. I think you will get your rhythm again.

I do things that make me uncomfortable. It sounds weird but it makes things interesting.

Again I'm sorry. I read my words back to myself. I don't communicate emotion very well I suppose.

My condolences
M.

My condolences.

Take it very slow, mourn and weep and take your time.

It's nearly my 41st Bday and my biological dad already sleeps.