I struggled with where to place this OP, but I settled here. It seems everyday we are forced to come to the realization that there are very few
things we have control over. There is a need on my part to constantly remind myself that life is genuinely constructed to cause us the most
consternation possible. Followed by constipation. Anticipation. Hallucination.
I am therefore I be.
Reality when it comes to any relationship is often misguided and cloaked in mystery. Very few show their true colors until that proverbial "CRAP"
hits the fan. Then and only then do we see reality for what it truly is.
If you are face to face with an insurmountable obstacle of any kind how do you overcome or deal with the prospect that the reality is not possible to
change? Acceptance.
Unfortunately, accepting something can not be changed is often harder than the obstacle itself. Banging your head into a brick wall over and over
again will not change anything other than the feeling in your head of that pounding, throbbing vein bulging out about to explode.
I have been through the wringer many times and the only way I can get through the process is to continually say this grouping of words to myself until
I am blind.
Give me the ability to accept the things I can not change (people, places, things);
Give me the ability to change the things that I can (me, myself, I)
Give me the ability to understand the difference.
Fairly self explanatory, right? Only, having the ability to understand the difference is not so simple or rather accepting the things I can not
change is incredibly difficult when that reality is constantly banging itself into my head begging for change. This is where the relationship part of
the equation comes in.
We do have a choice when it comes to the relationships we have with various situations. We do have the ability to decide what commitment is
necessary. Work, family, love, friends, acquaintances, strangers, animals; all require some form of or lack of commitment.
We don't sign contracts with everyone and everything we come in contact with and even if we do it has been demonstrated that contracts can be
violated. The level of commitment is either agreed upon or it has different meaning to parties involved. We all have our own idea of what we think
the appropriate commitment is supposed to be involving aspects of every relationship.
The term "unconditional love" is the ultimate form of a communicative challenge that all commitments either have or don't.
We do not have "unconditional love" for all people, places or things. We reserve that specific right for only the commitments that mean the most to
us. Over time, the commitment we have can change to be conditional. When the commitment becomes more challenging to deal with than it is worth the
time comes to distance ourselves. Worth is subjective and is difficult to quantify. We may not be able to see the worth of being in a destructive
situation. Perhaps that is why it is so difficult to walk away from relationships or give up that "unconditional" aspect.
Not all relationships have to have "love" in order to be unconditional commitments. There has to be readily seen and felt results for there to be a
continued commitment of any kind.
Not really sure where I am going with this OP, but the reason I am writing it is to help me deal with commitment issues of my own. I thought maybe
putting "pen to paper" would help me work out the kinks.
Thanks for your time.
edit on 28-12-2015 by soulpowertothendegree because: (no reason given)
edit on 28-12-2015 by
soulpowertothendegree because: (no reason given)